Sunday, March 11, 2018

EMO stuff...

How depressed I've been since I found a little stray, the cutest little chihuahua you ever laid eyes on...that's not the part that depressed me, it was the realization I can not take on a 4th dog. I could not keep him. I barely have my head above water, feeding and vetting the three I have, all who came into my life in this same way; left alone with no one to care for them!  When I make out my monthly budget I have to figure in dog food and heart worm preventive, it's so costly!  I had already sworn I was NOT taking in any more dogs.  It's hard to travel the way I want and drag them along as well as the expense of giving them the best life I can offer.  So tears all day... then when I left him at the Humane Society I was bawling like a 6 yr old in Walmart after mama said NO!  At some point in life you have to let someone else be the hero...I did all I could, I did not just turn my back on him I kept him one night and they were open Saturday so I took him before I had a chance to change my mind....I was already trying to convince myself I could do it...but it would mean a smaller slice of life for the 3 I've already made a commitment to, although his food bill wouldn't have been much... he was young he would need a complete vetting and he had not been fixed so right away medical bills, the girls are up for all their yearly vet checks in about a month. And it's very costly.  And I have plans! 

I hope the right family comes along and brings him into their hearts and home.  I have to think that will be the outcome.  When my heart is broken I turn to Nature to help me get through it...when I was a kid I had a horse, and I'd run and get a hug from her when things didn't go right her name was Silky...that big warm hug was like Silk, it got me right back on track.  Today no hug...just  cold hard realization.

*Sigh* why is life so hard sometimes?  
I hope this doesn't sound like an excuse post...If it would not have put me in a hardship to keep him I def would have. 

Remember when this little lady was found,


And then we found a home for her!  


I said in that post that finding a home for her left me open to help another dog,,,,and 4 yrs later Casey came along...so I did exactly what I said I would do, he was so old I figured he would not be adopted, but the little guy up top is young and sooo friendly he will be adopted I'm sure! He loved being cuddled, Casey hates to be cuddled he likes to be admired from a distance so kids were out of the question with him.  
Tell me I did the right thing...
 I only knew him 24 hrs and yet I feel a hole in my heart.  

...and then on Facebook a guy put up a photo of a Sharp Shinned hawk that  got caught in a fence...and no one saved him! It broke my heart...People were too afraid to help him-- so he bites, he claws, it won't kill you all you need is a jacket or a pair of gloves...most animals in need will allow you to help them...If only I could have been there! I would not have hesitated on helping him...they could have tossed a shirt over him and untangled him and he could have been saved he would need help, but it was doable. Bird rehab centers have connections to help birds, we used to take our birds of prey to the Zoo their vet department would patch them up and then they would come to our center to heal and get strong and be released and if unable to be released a network of people who are licensed to keep them as Education birds or place them in facilities where they would be cared for would be utilized...so doing nothing is just not acceptable. There is just no way in Hell I'd take a photo of a bird in a situation like that then just walk away?  Never...I'd die trying to help him.  

Not a good week for me emotionally.  






PEACE
Every day is a new Adventure.

18 comments:

  1. You have such a beautiful heart, you did the right thing by the little guy, yes vetting is expensive and to get them fixed can be costly as well. Of course not knowing his history all shots would be needed plus the fixing. Lots of folks look for little dogs who are more manageable especially for elderly people. As for the Hawk how awful, usually just covering the eyes will keep them calm and let you handle them. I could never walk away from an animal in distress anymore than a human in distress. I guess we don't all think or feel the same way. Again you did the best for the pup and your pups he will get a home.

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    1. Thank you Jo, I know you understand the expense with your sweet little Fred, little doesn't mean little cost. I know with my girls at 10 yrs this yr and Casey at 15 they are going to need more vet services than they have in the past...That was on my mind plus the fact that I have made the decision to not make any more commitments right now.

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  2. Hugs and love .. to you and to that pup. That's a really tough thing to do, to have to turn away. Makes my heart hurt for you and for him. I believe someone is already making plans to head to that Humane Society and, little do they know right now, but the perfect dog is waiting right there for them. Bless you.

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    1. Hi Ann, it took me a couple of weeks just to be able to write this post and share it...I really do let my emotions get the best of me sometimes. Thank you for your warm comment.

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  3. You did the right thing. I'm sure a little friendly dog like that will soon be found an excellent home. It is very hard, but you saved him, and passed him onto people who will re home him. The bottom line is you have to be realistic with 3 dogs to take care of the bills must be high. Vets bills here are astronomical compared to what they were 30 years ago when we had pets. So hopefully you will be happier and you have your plans....which we are looking forwarding to finding out what they are.

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    1. Thanks Dave, I spent that night trying to convince myself I could make space in my life and budget for one more then I reminded myself that I had upcoming plans and he would have to be included...and then I realized I had to let go.

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  4. Hello, what a cutie, I think someone will come and take this pup from the rescue. I think you did the right thing, even though it was hard.

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    1. He was a cutie a real heart throb for a dog lover, the perfect size if I didn't already have 3, he weighted less than 10 lbs! I figured his age at maybe 1 yr.

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  5. Oh it's hard isn't it, but you definitely did the right thing, i've been there, there is only so much you can do!

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    1. Hi Pam, it sure pushed me over the emotional edge for a couple weeks. Thanks for your support!

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  6. I'm so sorry Sondra -- life is a bummer sometimes. For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing with the little chi -- your other dogs need you and I am sure the little one will find the right home ... my guess is that it is easier to find the right one for a small young (and cuddly) dog... you specialize in the ones who need extra love and attention ... and I know it is a big budget item. (I know I know we are dog free, but all four of our kids have dogs, so I am a grandma)....

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    1. Thanks Sallie...your comment means a lot to me...I hope one day I'll be a recovering dog addict. I find it so hard to turn away from an animal in need.

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  7. This is a sad story. I have had a lifelong love of, and commitment to, nature and it’s wild creatures, but I have never had the slightest desire to have domestic pets. When I read accounts like this I have no regrets about that decision.

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    1. David, I wish I could be more like you but I feel a certain responsibility to do what I can...this time I couldn't. I just hope the right person comes along to help this little fellow have a long happy life!

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  8. You have a pretty great track record with rescuing animals in need so I am putting my money on that cutie being adopted quickly. You absolutely did the right thing, don't doubt that for a second!

    That's awful about the hawk, what is wrong with people? I remember finding a gadwall stuck in shrub a few years ago (don't ask me how this happened) but the shrub was in the middle of a cold flooded pond. Didn't hesitate, just rolled up my pants and told Jake to "stay" and plopped into the water to save it. Thankfully my noise scared it so much it was able to free itself and it seemed ok.

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    1. I could just see you doing that too Jen...so happy the hawk was able to get free! We love our dogs so much but it sure is not the easy road. I'm just so happy all mine are currently in good health and they seem very happy. Casey is really slowing down so I worry about him, he never gains any weight and he lost 2 teeth. Some days he acts like he can barely move...his whole face is grey, but he still goes about this routine pretty much!

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  9. You are on the road and I am catching up a bit on what is happening in your world. I am so sorry you had to give up this pup...we totally, totally understand are in the same position. All the new ones that continue to show up have to go somewhere else. Good for you for helping him get to a good shelter and for providing food and love for a night. You have a huge heart!!! Safe and fun travels. We need some serious warmth in Ohio. This winter is long and it's wearying. I will blog about our trip soon. I'm so behind!

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    1. Jennifer I thought of you guys when I saw some signs for the AZ trail and I wondered if you were on or off the trail by now. There is some amazing territory in AZ! Each Zone is different and has so much to offer.

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