This was a really hard week for us, and now the "work" of wrapping up someone's life is either done or a lot of progress has been made. Mom had a wonderful send off but the weather was not very good...cold and rain battled us. She was so beautiful in life and in death. I know death is not something any of us want to talk about but I do encourage you all to have a conversation about it!
We were so happy when we got word her oldest brother and sister would be attending, they made a heroic drive down with their families so we had 10 family members at her entombment. One miracle was in searching for some photos we wanted to share at her visitation my sister found a sealed envelope with my Aunt Jeans name on it, mom's sister. She had written her a special thought and never for some reason given it to her so that was given..and what a sweet message it was. A treasure forever.
Mom made a lot of decisions herself, she had purchased her mausoleum space long back and so we had some decisions to make but not a whole lot...also she had enough life insurance to cover her final expenses but not excess amounts, so keep in mind your passing is not about leaving people wealth, its about your funeral and the debts you may be leaving behind.
I am ok so far but each day leaves that empty feeling of "I really miss Mom", I can't have any more conversations with her, all the remaining wisdom of her lifetime she took with her, now we are completely on our own...she had always been there for each one of us...I don't know how a single child deals with this without my sisters I would have had a complete meltdown.
As a tribute to Mom for the remainder of the year I will post of photo of her and explain what we were up to. Many of you were along with us in real time as had our little adventures...so today it's
PEACE
Every day is a new Adventure.
Hello, your Mom will always be there with you in your heart and memories.
ReplyDeleteThe trip to Yellowstone, lots of great memories of your road trip. I am sure your Mom would want you to get back to normal too. Love the last photo of your Mom. God bless and hugs...
Thanks so much Eileen...you are so right tons of memories to shift through and each one a treasure to me.
DeleteThat is such a great idea to post a memory. She surely did look young (if a bit apprehensive) for 74 in that picture. Getting back to normal is a work in progress and will be for a while ... but nature will help. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteHi Sallie, and thank you. I know things will never be the same but trying to resume a routine does help me especially since my mind is unfocused at the moment...a little auto pilot will help me out.
DeleteYou're right getting back to "normal" is a good thing but its not easy and it will take a while before a new routine etc becomes the norm. Family and friends never leave us they remain in our memories forever. All the best.
ReplyDeleteVery true Dave...it is not easy to go thru it moment to moment, but we have no choice. I keep humming one of the songs that was played at her burial it's like Im still standing right there as I go about my routing of lawn care, chores, and taking care of business.
DeleteGetting back to normal will take its own time. You can help it along a little by being ready for it, but you can't impose it in yourself. Your mom had a good life, surrounded by the love, devotion and care of her children, and it seems to me that it doesn't get much better than that. You did well, Sondra.
ReplyDeleteThank you kindly David...Mom was one of the fortunate ones who had 3 daughters who paid her back for all the love she gave us over the years by keeping her in her own home..we all sacrificed but it was cherished time.
DeleteYou and your sisters have so many memories to go back to, plus so many pictures of your wanderings with your Mom. Just getting back into normal as you call it will let you ease back into things. But it takes time. You took such good care of her and gave her the best thing lots of love and care. The flower pictures are just beautiful. Take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteWe sure do thank you Jo...each of us did what we could to make mom's golden years easier and there are no regrets in that.
DeleteI'm glad to hear your mom had a nice send-off with close family. Keep being kind to yourself while you ease back into normal life. The photo of your mom made me smile and reminded me of my own mom. Thanks for sharing it.
ReplyDeleteThank you Jen, my Mom had an adventurous side but she had a lot of fear that had to be calmed in order for her to enjoy herself, so a little reassurance went a long way for her. Today my sisters and I took a wonderful walk through the woods and spotted some birds, read some sign of track made by other critters and walked over a log bridge. It was a fun time!
DeleteThe flowers are beautiful :) It's a lovely idea to post the memories, she seemed to have a very full life with you all!
ReplyDeleteHi Pam, thank you for your visit! It will take me a while to work through my emotions of not having her in my daily life!
DeleteWhen I lost my parents I did find that getting back to "normal" helped, but it takes a while and isn't easy. Our memories become all the more precious and special.
ReplyDeleteI send my good wishes.
All the best Jan
HO true Jan, sorry for the loss of your parents, many people my age do not have their parent around...I lost my dad when I was 11 yrs old so I barely remember him.
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